Monday, November 13, 2006

Revenge and Other Matters

Our bondage is over. We now have the run of the house as is our right. The dog does too. Mother has tried to make up for her sins by getting a new scratching post and another cat tree. Scrappy, Tucker and I had a meeting and we decided that she was just trying to buy us off. She still had to pay. I barfed on her pillow last week and she didn't say a thing. Soo...We thought we would try something else...

Tucker: What would really get her?

Scrappy: don't do anything mean

Badness: She must pay for this indignity! What does she fear the most?

Tucker: Centipedes?

Scrappy: Life without chocolate?

Badness: no...Losing on of us. That would get her good. We should hide.

Tucker: I am already hiding!

Scrappy: That is cuz your are a wimp. Badness, that would scare our mama!

Badness: That is the plan!

So...I waited for the appropriate opportunity while the Mother was out walking the dog. One of the carpet guys had opened up a nice dark space in a closet. The dark space went behind the huge, white, water dish that the Mother washs herself in. I inspected the opening and decided this would be a perfect place. I went in. I also contrived to have one of the carpet guys leave the back door open so the mother would think I had gotten outside.

It worked! Scrappy said as soon as the Mother came in she saw the open back door. I could hear the Mother calling my name. She went into the back yard and down the alley. Scrappy said she even went around to the neighbors if that had seen a fluffy black and white cat that looks like a cow (what?! that insult will need to be taken care of too). Of course, no one had seen me cuz I was actually still in the house.

I made sure every now and then when she was calling my name to let out a pitiful meow. That really got her! She thought I was trapped somewhere, outside!!!

But, then, Scrappy, who was starting to feel very guilty came and told me The Mother was crying. I may be a cool customer but I did feel a bit ashamed of myself for making the Mother cry. So during one of her many trip through the house calling my name, I peaked my head out of the dark space to let her know where I was. She was relieved.

But to make sure I remained in control of the situation, I refused to come out for several more hours. I am a cat after all. I don't respond to emotional human pleadings.

6 Comments:

Blogger William said...

Oh, Badness, that doesn't sound very good. Getting your mom all upset because she thought she lost you is never good. You should get her upset only by yakking up on stuff.

8:05 PM  
Blogger Cecilia & The 2Bs said...

We think it is appropriate punishment for putting you behind a closed door with a dog!
We are still deciding how to get our Mom back for bringing that furry little rat into ouR home!

12:58 PM  
Blogger one of us said...

Badness we now know why you have the name you have :) ~Merlin, SHadow, KO kO

1:07 PM  
Blogger Kimo & Sabi said...

You are "badness!"

8:11 PM  
Blogger nels, ed, nitro, and/or xing said...

badness, you really are badness!! you shouldn't scare the mother--she LOVES you!! try to find some other way to punish her. hurling on her pillow sounds about right, but repeat it several times!

be good, and we bet you'll get some turkey tomorrow!

best wishes for a happy thanksgiving to efurryone at your house, from

nels, ed, nitro, & xing

7:08 PM  
Blogger Les Trois Chats said...

Oh, Badness - maybe you went a little far. Making Mommy cry makes me feel really, really bad. I can't stand it! (I am glad that you weren't actually lost, though. That would have been horrible for her.)
~ moose

8:01 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home