Sunday, March 26, 2006

Coyote Bait!

Daisy Sunshine:

Yesterdays, Mama took me for a walk in the foothills again. We heared a pretty birdie singing and Mama said it was a Curved Bill Thrasher. It was sitting proudly up on top of a cactus singing his little brians out! But it sure did sound pretty. He did it till the sun went down cuz he was still there on his cactus when we was walking back.

But guess what else we seed!!! A coyote!!! A real, live coyote. Mama always told me they lived up there but we'd never seed one before. Mama said we must have walked right passed it on the path cuz we seed it down below us when we were further up the hill. It was right there!!! Where we was!!! Mama said it was a good thing I was on my leash cuz I could've been coyote bait! I don't wanna be coyote bait but I don't wanna walk on my leash, neither.

Here are some pictures of me being a Rock Hound!

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Kitty Herbs!!!


ohhh kitty grass it sooo goompffff mffummmfumm murumppfh. MURMMFFMMFPH!

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Badness isn't the Only One


Hey! I am preparing for my event too! But it is kinda hard to do with an empty dish. I have to wrestle Fat Eric, you know.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Catalympics First Practice


We are very excited about the upcoming Catalympics. I am practicing for my event at the Catalympics, Fitting In Small Boxes. I am working on my form. What do you think?

Notice how compact I sit and yet maintain my natural elegance. But my tail isn't wrapping all the way around my front paws.

Now that is a gorgeous cat!

The Mother: Badness, some humility please.

Badness: I am so bad, I am good.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

How This Bad Cat Got Her Name


Let me state for the record that I am bad. I have no need or desire to deny it. If something is in my way, I will make it get out of my way. If there is a nice spot to sleep on, even if it is the Mother's delicate silk sweater, I will still lay on it and knead to make it comfortable. If I am happy sleeping in the middle of the stairs, there I shall stay. If I want to eat the Mother's dried roses, I will eat the Mother's dried roses no matter how high up she puts them.

The Mother missed my "so what" expression. I wish she would learn to take clearer pictures.

Monday, March 13, 2006

It Snowed!!!


There was white, cold, wet stuff all over the ground yesterday! I didn't like it when I had to poo in it. It was too cold on my paws. Tucker said it was snow. Mama said my chihuahua DNA has beaches and Cabo San Lucas written in it. ?????

But later mama took me up into the foothills to walk in the snow. She made me wear my coat that I HATE, but I was glad, cuz it was COLD and WINDY. The wind made my ears stand up. It was fun to chase the blowing snow and then catch it and eat it. Everything smelled clean too.

My Doxie genes won.

It was so much fun running in the snow!

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Hello!? Anyone there? This is Badness. The Mother finally joined the 21st century and got a camera phone. Bare with her, she is still learning to use it so the pics are kind of fuzzy. She says she will get better.

Mama, take me for a walk!!! You said you were gonna clean but you are just playin' on the 'puter. It would be more fun to take me for a walk. Done make me get all whiny.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006


I am spending time with my mama all by myself. No dog, no icky brother, just me and my mama. It is nice. Only my mama can scratch my ears so good! Purrrrrrr! Badness is downstairs eating her Stinky Goodness.

What do you like to watch on TV? Do you mamas and daddys leave the TVs on for you during the day? Our mama leaves good TV on. She says it is PBS. We watch Arthur and Between the Lions, of course, heehehehee.

Mama was reading Into the Wild to us but she got caught up in Bleak House by some man named Dickens (Timothy?). It wasn't very interesting for us cats. But atleast the book caused lots of lap time for us kitties (and the dog). I think that is what books are really good for. Lap time!!!

Mama said I should include a picture of myself. I don't know which one. Oh! I have one!!! I was very proud of this. It was my toy stash at our last house. It took me a long time to make it. I put all my toys under my mama chest of drawers. I had a wonderful collections of things, beads, rings off milk jugs, pen caps, the little caps off of mama's eye cases (you know, those little things humans put in their eyes in the morning. Mama's eyes are all squinty til she puts hers on).

That is how I earned my cat name, Swiftpaw. Because I was so good at taking things.

Don't tell mama, but I have started another stash here at our new house.

Plan B has also failed. I underestimated the Mother's adoration for this BEAST. I had the BEAST trapped under the sofa for several minutes. I had intended to keep her under there til...well forever. But the Mother noticed the BEAST was missing and rescued the BEAST from under the sofa. On to Plan C.

Thursday, March 02, 2006



Foiled Again! Yesterday, I had the perfect plan for removing the BEAST from my home. The subtlety and finesse! Elegance and Grace were required to carry out this plan. You see, the Mother places the BEAST'S piddle pads in the big rumbly, white machine room everyday. Disgusting! I know it makes the Mother unhappy if the BEAST doesn't use the pads. What better way to get rid of the dog than to block her way to the pads. I thought for sure BEAST messes around the house would be the END of the BEAST.

So I slept on the pile of clothes in the door way to the room. All...Day...Long. Everything went according to plan. The BEAST didn't dare walk past me as I lay contentedly purring on the laundry as innocent as can be. I have struck that much fear in her heart. Instead, she went on plastic laid down in the living room, four times! My plan was working!

Unfortunately, my plan was discovered when the Mother came home. I had been so confident in my feline abilities of subtleness that I remained laying on the laundry after she came home. She was smarter than I thought. She immediately figured out why the BEAST had pottied in the living room. My plan fell to ruins.

She didn't get mad at the BEAST. All the she said was, "It isn't your fault. It's okay little girl." Gag me.

Needless to say, I tried to act as nonchalant as possible. Completely innocent, incapable of such diabolical plans. The Mother thinks I was just looking for a comfortable place to sleep. Little does she know...


Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Tucker: Either you or Badness is going to starve!?!?!?!

Scrappy: Why?

Tucker: Because one of the dishes is empty!

Scrappy: But there are still two full dishes. Can't we eat out of one of those?

Tucker: No, no, no. That ain't how it works. One bowl belongs to me and the other full bowl belongs to you or Badness. You two will have to decide who will starve!

Scappy: Then who ate all the food in the bowl that wasn't theirs!??!?!

Tucker: Well, I did. Cuz it was my bowl before it was empty.

Scrappy: HISSS!!! :::smacks brother on head:::